H4 Run #1659: The TRUE Hangover Hash

Hared by Pull the Pr*ck Out, Brrrrrrgghh and NARC

After a long weekend of indulging in Maredsous 8, Allagash and BM2’s hella strong homebrew, I had a fever, and the only prescription was more cowbell… and the TRUE hangover hash!

Pull the Prick Out was in town for the holidays from France, so she teamed up with our super harriette, Brrrrrgghh and beer b*tch, NARC, to lay an urban trail on this cloudy, wintry Sunday before she heads home. The hounds met at the Harley Davidson parking lot at 1960 and 290 for a 3:00pm start, freezing our nips off waiting for chalk talk.

What Does the Backwards J Mean?

Finally, the hashers were off. Running through a neighborhood, the checks were easily solved by the FRBs, who had instructions to run to the back of the pack when they came to a fishhook marking. I understand that Saran Crap was the only one who ran back, and he only ran halfway back. Good luck enforcing those kind of rules with the hash…

Along the bayou, through the neighborhood, over a high fence, Easy to Please and Just Jarrod were ahead of me at a water crossing where we saw the last mark. I blindly followed them because they saw runners ahead at one point. We found a mark a half mile away hidden in a flower bed, then on top of a low brick wall. Wandering, and more wandering, on-on through a soggy field, through another hood, and across the street until we bump into Geek.

He sent us in the right general direction, but since we were not on flour, we were flying blind. ID10T and EZ to Plz found a plop, and we headed down the bank of another water feature, but there was no flour to be found.

The back of the pack caught up to us, called us ugly names, and found trail back and on the other side of the water feature. Through a Home Depot parking lot, we see the end across a swampy field. I managed to keep my feet dry through the whole run, mostly, but f*@k it. BEER NEAR!

I missed out on the bananas, so I had to settle for the chocolate truffles and a mini pecan pie. Mmmm! There was quite an assortment of delicacies, and the hares provided a keg of St. Arnold’s Winter Stout (yum), along with Geek and Lorna’s leftover p*ss beer from the New Year’s Day Hangover Hash.

B*tt Pirate was off cheering for his little football team, so Mama’s Boy stepped in to RA. With the robust beer being sucked down by the pint, the crowd of over 50 was lively.

Brrrrrgghh and Pull the Prick Out took their accusations like a couple of champs, and with all of that girl power, they dismissed NARC as the beer b*tch that he was, not letting him drink with the hares. Poor NARC!

EZ to Plz tried really hard to name Just Jarrod, who smashed his hoo-ha’s on the fence crossing. Evidently, Just Jarrod is a singer, so she proposed “High C” or “Choir Boy”, but nothing stuck. Many others were tossed about, including “Rusty Taint”, “Tainted Hole”, etc, etc. Talk amongst yourselves. We’ll discuss it later.

Just Kelsey was accused of not running the full trail, and being pushed in a Target grocery cart for about 200 yards. Glad He Ate Her was accused of being the pusher, but received a beer refill and was congratulated for “acceptable hash behavior”. The EZ to Plz family tried with all of their might to name Just Kelsey, but there is no family namings in the hash!

The former Just Ali was named at the Blue Moon hash, so her hash name was blessed at the H4 hash. She went down as Just Ali, and she rose as “C*rcle Jerk”. Mama’s Boy was careful not to get her hip, yet non-hashing attire stained with the dark beer.

Pleather Balls was accused of eating it on trail, as well as a few other lame accusations. A*$wipe was confused by the 2 pair of ample pink ta-tas in the circle. Vote for Pedro was accused of being a “young’n”.

Klosit Phreek told a lovely tale of her boyfriend, Just Steve, en route to the hash, offering her a weak a*s Bud light when she wanted a brass monkey, and that his drink of choice, being a bartender and all, is a strawberry daquiry. McP*sser suggested the name “Da-queer-y”… hilarious, but it was tabled.

Tap Dat A*$ was lost on trail, so NARC and Pull the Prick Out went in search of. They had found her by the time we made it back to the start to go to the on-on-on. Mama’s Boy saved the day.

Freezing and semi-dr*nk, we stumbled our way to the nearby Brewskies for the on-on-on, where hungry hashers could order a sandwich at the bar to be delivered from the Texadelphia sandwich shop next door. Fun, fun and more fun! So much that BM2 and I realized after 10 minutes on the road home that we had not closed out our bar tab… back to the bar.

Thanks, Brrrrgghh, Pull the Prick Out, and NARC for a fun hashing day! Safe traveling to you, Pull the Prick Out! Till next time!

On-on to the Backwards Hash and less than 2 weeks of R*ACE training!

Your dieting scribe,
Really?? F*@k!!!

See EZ to PLZ’s pictures here.