Hares: Ramrod and Tender Vittles (again)
Let’s go back a couple of days. July 10, discount 2011. 4 pm. Townwood Park. Everything seems normal. Hash cash is paid, hashers are stretching, drinking, voting and talking. The pack is milling about waiting for the hares, Tender Vittles and Ramrod, to announce chalk talk. Little did they know, there is someone else. Someone else is waiting for the hounds to take off. Someone else is hanging around….
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mR3jnW2kcUs)
The trail started out like a typical Tender Vittles trail. It was hot, it was humid and it had 4 big “Fs” in the first 50 yards of trail. True trail crossed the bayou and the pack stayed together fairly well until they came to another check and realized the trail crossed BACK over the bayou. Trail went through some private property and came out on another part of the bayou where the pack found Tender Vittles manning a water check under a bridge (of course). At this point the pack ran along the road to a little fenced area where Tender had so kindly threw flour DIRECTLY on poison ivy. After a little bit more running the pack came upon Ramrod manning a beer and melon check. The hounds were somewhat disappointed because it was a WATERmelon check and not the melons we all know and love some much in the hash. Just a little farther along and the pack came to the end where they found Tender Vittles with a keg of St. Arnolds amber and where they learned that, in typical Tender haring, cars had been broken in to on trail.
It was then time for circle and boy was it a doozy. Mama’s Boy stepped in for Snatcha, who was at the start talking to the police about her broken window. After the initial start of the circle, McPisser took over and the accusations started. Right off the bat, the hares were called in multiple times to pay for the crimes against the hash and allowing cars to be broken in to. We were lucky enough to have Gangrene Hose visiting from DFW and he provided the circle with songs we hadn’t heard after we exhausted our own supply on the hares down downs. As the keg quickly drained, we heard that Snatcha had tracked her stolen iPad but due to her skin color, the police would be unable to help. Blow Hole took matters into her own hands by cussing out the kids hanging out in the parking lot for being the wrong color as well and making her look bad.
After the circle was over, a few brave souls ventured over to Orem Sports Bar for the Ononon. It was a large and spacious bar with a few pool tables and a good music selection. Rancid Asshole started us off with a couple of buckets of beer and Dr. Strangerub followed that up with 4 pizzas that were quickly devoured. Beer was consumed, chess was played and the hares were given a few more honorary down-downs as extra punishment. Sorry to Snatcha and Blow-hole for their bad luck. The hares were made to pay.