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| Monday morning came too early, as usual. I stumbled out of bed and
vowed never to hash again, as the aftereffects of the Full Moon hash the
night before were all too apparent to me. My condition could be easily
summarized in three words: explosive, watery, diarrhea. Eating three bags
of Cajun pork rinds seemed like such a good idea the night before. After
a quick shower, I was ready for work. As I headed out the door I glanced
at my watch and figured that it was going to be a pretty decent day after
all - I was only running one hour late getting to work. The congealed blood
in my veins that was causing my head to throb was starting to break up
and I was actually starting to feel good! I started thinking about my next
hash, just as soon as my brain came back online. I knew it was tonight,
but I could not remember who the hares were. I was shocked when I got a
call two hours later from “Bald Eagle” who had just realized that the *Free*
Mismanagement hash was today. “Shit”, I said, “Is mismanagement supposed
to hare that hash?” Regretfully, the answer to that question was “Yes”.
I quickly called all the members of mismanagement in a vain attempt to
see if anyone was prepared for the hash tonight. Here are the responses
that I got:
“Full Service” : I have a six pack I could bring.
It was obvious that some leadership was needed, so I called my mother right away and asked for advice. Her first suggestion was to disband the hash. I was slightly sad, and I wasn’t sure what to do with my time if I didn’t spend it all hashing. But, then again, I would have free time to visit her more. Maybe I could even move back home soon! I’m not sure why, but she changed her mind about disbanding the hash and said I should get more involved. I was soon off the phone and had some great ideas for the hash that was now only 4 hours away. I left for the start of the hash at 5:30 pm. It took a just under an hour to drive to the start of the run, so we had a little more than 30 minutes to lay the trail. The location was beautiful. To the North I could see a white dust cloud that enveloped a nearby wall board factory. The wind was blowing in just the right direction to carry in the tantalizing smells of the bakery that was slightly west of the start. Looking east, I could see the sun glinting off a building that was part of a huge gypsum production facility. The sounds from the limestone quarry to the south were still in the air when we started laying trail. There were enough white marks in the area that we only bothered laying checks. Each member of mismanagement was tasked with laying at least 10 checks. I cautioned everyone to keep to checks within a ten mile radius of the start. The trail was ready exactly on time - 15 minutes after the announced start time. The hashers were off, and it was time to find the end of the run. We drove aimlessly for about 30 minutes and then decided to unpack our stuff in the middle of a dead end road. We hoped that there were some errant marks out there somewhere that somehow led to this place. We unpacked our goodies and made a great spread. Between all the members of mismanagement cleaning out their cabinets, we had plenty of food. Most was slightly stale, but leaving it in the sun for a while helped out somewhat. “Full Service” was even able to find 2 half kegs of beer in her garage that were left over from a Cinco de Mayo celebration in 1992. After icing it down, it wasn’t half bad! Miraculously, the pack managed to make it in. The only exception was “Shuttle Cock”, who ran 17 miles in the wrong direction, foolishly trusting his hash instinct. The trail that the hashers had deemed as true trail sounded very interesting. Apparently, they ran through several fields, were chased by a farmer in a pickup truck, made multiple bayou crossings, climbed a hill for a great view of downtown, fought their way through 5 foot tall shiggy, swam a lake, had a close call with some killer bees, and ran through poison ivy forest before finally finding the end. Bewildered, I polled the other mismanagement members to ask if they had seen any of these places. They were likewise astonished at the stories that they were hearing. Oh well, it turned out to be a great hash in spite of “Mismanagement”. |
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