Run No: 1148

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Yes it seemed like East San Antonio as we made our way to the most westerly starting locations of the year-I-10 near Barker Cypress. But that’s alright, "weeds out the weak players ya know"…Shigadelic.

Now, it was well known that a cold front was headed our way. It was in the low 40’s in Dallas, snowing in the Panhandle, and, although it was still warm in East San Antonio, the dark clouds were moving in and the wind: restless. You would think I might bring a rain jacket just incase the hares didn’t think to provide shelter……...Naaa.

Anywho, the hares had us starting at a "Drug Free High School"- I didn’t think such an institution existed, but it did think it warranted a down down for the hares because we couldn’t drink. Jeez, couldn’t they find a Charter Hospital nearby; I know those guys party.

The pack was sent off with the notion that the start was a check? ….OK? …And, after P.P. yelled "backcheck" at the end of a long blacktop with shiggy entrances off both sides, I finally understood why (I done had me some schoolin’). There was a false on the Bear Creek running/bladeing/walking/biking/and now- hashing trail to the West off the backcheck.

[an aside: It’s funny how locals always seem to be slightly curious about what we are doing. In the Ward’s they ask, "who you runnin’ from" and in the more affluent parts they ask, " who are you chasing", and in the Burbs they just vacantly stare.]

True trail headed along the paved path to East, but you knew we didn’t come all this way to run pavement and then the arrow into the shiggy. I nearly disregarded the arrow and followed Ass Grabber continuing on the paved trail, but I remembered I had agreed to write hash trash (might miss something worth documenting). I might have missed the Mouse-friendly shiggy. I might have missed giving Saran Crap, running ahead of me, a helpful nudge as his foot tangled in a vine….Heh Heh; I had barely stopped laughing before I found my-own feet tangled up in a vine and —TIMBER! (shiggy is a great equalizer). I definitely would have missed, as most people did, the crime scene complete with police tape and a chalk outline of Geek in the fetal position (let your imaginations run wild here).

Sure enough we ended back on the paved trail with Ass Grabber miles ahead (but not for long). Enter the second-even longer back-check alongside of a small airfield. I was weary and ready for this thing to end when I noticed a intensely glowing disc along the side of the road. I picked it up and shielded my eyes to read the inscription- Elvis Presley The Memphis Recordings. I then heard a Voice from above!……it was The King in a Halo of light!!…And as he pointed to the North and said, "ON ON BABY!,..ON ON!" and then he extended his finger towards me and said, "HEY MAN, COULD YOU PULL MY FINGER?" And although I was very grateful he showed me the way, I politely declined saying I was in hurry to find some beer. If you don’t believe this is true ask me and I’ll show the CD to prove it.

Well Elvis was spot on as I found flour to the North leading to a long freshly excavated ditch along side of a golf course. And the scavenger hunt continued as I picked up a like-new golf ball with a Wheaties logo on it and a whistle with the chrome worn off of it. A whistle?…who would need a whistle out here (you’ll find out)? As On On was called in the distance to another check along the ditch. Well Elvis got his revenge here as the whole hash spent 30 minutes solving this check. I headed back East towards a dirt mound and ran into Ass Grabber. From our bird’s-eye view he proclaims to see the On Home. Even though I couldn’t see it I decide to follow him just in case. As we make our way towards the hopeful end, Ass Grabber points to a group of domesticated white geese and exclaims, "look at the Swans". I guess I don’t have to tell you it wasn’t the On Home.

Well Roller Balls finally solved the "Geek" check and the ON Home was off of another backcheck near Clays restaurant which ended up being the ON ON ON location. It rained like hell during the circle and blocks of ice where utilized by Dick the Boy Wonder to punish the private parties. A friend of SOS’s was named Thong Long Gone for a thong left at a previous hash (interesting!), Heart Ache was given a pacifier for child-like behavior the night before….all while the rain came down like buckets….Ah you know the rest….On On…..thanks to the Hares