Happy
New Year! First let me say that I
thought the hangover hash was to help get rid of the hangover from the night
before, not create a new one for the next day.
Question: What do Flounder,
Fire Tunnel, Crack of Dawn, Digit Input, Loony Poon, Rain Bitch, Full Service,
Tuna Delight, Shit On a Shingle, and Cums Happily have in common? Answer to come within this hash trash.
The
11:30 a.m. hash started off at Riff Raff’s bar, Live Bait, with
hot apple cider, mimosas, and aspirin.
The hares moved us out to the 33 degree parking lot for a chalk talk
about 12:15 p.m. Halfmoon,
dressed in a bathrobe, Mexican hat and pink fuzzy slippers, promised a short
run, two mimosa checks, and a great on-on at the end.
The
pack took off in a south-east direction and after about five minutes Burning
Rubber was already grumbling about too long of a run! Little did he know, it was no where near
being over. The first check lead to a back check which put Roller Balls
and Dickhead back toward the end of the pack. We finally hit the first mimosa check with Halfmoon still
in his bathrobe and slippers. Mmmmm,
mimosas and hot cider. As we took off
from that check, Halfmoon announced “You are more than half way there!” Silly me, I believed him. Most of the checks
and falses were figured out before I even got there, so I can’t clue you in to
who solved what and how quickly. I do
know that one check lead to a false in the Rice parking lot (I think that is
what that parking lot was) and put a lot of the pack back together again. After true trail was found, the pack spread
out and didn’t come back together again.
Along the way, Ass Grabber stole some balloons from a restaurant
and tide them to the sweat band on his head; EZ Fag, Balut, and Dumpster
Digger stopped to pose for a picture on a tractor; Roller Balls, Pee Wee, and Grind
Slut ran to Halfmoon’s house thinking the last mimosa check would be
there (it wasn’t). At the last mimosa
check, Halfmoon told us that we could short cut through the park and end up on
trail, or we could run south and follow true trail. Hershey Highway, Rain Bitch and several others
decided to short cut. But I decided to
follow true trail. 5.14 miles later
(5.8 for Roller and his buddies because they made the Halfmoon
stop) we arrived back at Live Bait to start working on a hangover for the next
day.
Before
we even circled up, the hash was treated to a naked down-down by Fire Tunnel
(via video). “Why am I naked?” Fire
Tunnel asked out loud. (Will He
Peter and Digital Input brought a video from a hash event back in
1996.) Grind Slut got us all
circled up inside Live Bait and the fun began!
There
were down-downs for
The
circle must have lasted at least an hour, and after that much drinking (in what
seemed like 50 oz. cups) the hash was feeling mighty fine. Right after the
circle, Fire Tunnel traded shirts with Penis Illin and treated
many hashers to more nakedness. Somehow
that turned into the great bra-off and the bras started flying. Digital Input got a little help from Fire
Tunnel and myself. Then without
warning, Digital treated the on-looking hashers to what had been released when
the bra came off. Will He Peter,
limping to the rescue, demanded “Ok, that’s enough dear” and was then treated
to a private showing by Fire Tunnel, Digital Input and myself. I don’t
remember much after that except the belly rub-off with Cameron and his
award winning abs and Roller Balls enlightening us with “The color of a
woman’s lips on her face match the color of her other set of lips.” I then took it upon myself to find out if
that was true – and it is – and that’s what all the harriettes listed above
have in common. Both sets of lips match in color! They proved Roller Balls’ theory is correct. Oh, yeah, there was some nipple licking
going on as well. I am not going into
details, you just had to be there.
The
one good thing about doing the hangover hash so early, is that you can drink,
run, drink, get drunk, eat dinner and be home in bed asleep (or should I say
passed out) by 7 p.m. Whew! If this is a sign of what is to come this
year….YIKES!
On-On,
Shit On a Shingle
Click
Here for more Hash Trash on Run #1155
by Roller Balls