It was dreary day as Hashers trickled in to the run start at the Kroger’s at 20th and Yale in the Heights. As I drove up I saw Womb Service flying down the street. I’m sure for someone who ran his 1st Marathon in 3:09, we thought he was just getting in an easy pre-Hash work-out. But, more on that later. The rain let up long enough for Hashers to socialize in the parking lot before the run. Sleds and Turds was promoting wooden beer mugs, hand carved in the Philippines. They looked pretty cool, he promised the H4 logo and your Hashname carved on the 16? Oz mug. I gladly pre-invested and paid him $18.
All Head No Shaft (AHNS) gathered the pack and announced this was his last time to Hare in Houston and that he was moving (somewhere) overseas. WeBlowDick (WBD) was more or less a mystery hare except she also sagged bags.
Did I say it was drizzling and cold. The pack took off to the west, but immediately hooked to the north and then back towards Height Blvd. Grind Slut, Dickhead, and Womb Service (FRB’s) took off and I never do see them again. I hung back with Pee Wee and Thong Long Gone waiting for the pack who we never saw again to loop back west again and cross Heights. So much for wishful thinking. Then Pee Wee disappeared into the fog. I was about to take off and look for the pack when Thong Long Gone started walking (hip injury). Not wanting to leave a Harriette all by herself (this is where you can start laughing) and knowing it’d take forever to find trail walking, not to mention is was wet and freezing once you started walking, I suggested we circle back to the start and “read the map, but you can’t tell anybody!”. All was fine, until Heartache (aka Mr Happy) drove up…. BUSTED! I told him the pack was last seen dashing towards the southwest…. J!
We eventually found what was later described as an easy trail. We joined Tom Swift and found the ON Home near 13th and Studewood.
Dark Beer was flowing at the ON ON. It end at a nice little house across from a Middle School. Obviously, WeBlowDick had talked her cousin into letting the Hash use his back driveway and garage for the ON ON.
Dickhead relieved as RA. Heartache came up and congratulated me for sending him southwest where he never found trail, he circled down to I-10 and finally ran into a hasher on Heights and followed trial in from there… hee hee! No rules! Womb Service did a DownDown for pre-scouting trail. Roller Balls accused him of yelling “CHECK!” a block before he even saw the check. The best DownDown and naming of the day was for Richard (previously known as Mr Toolbox). EZ Fag told the story of Richard in the military, before meeting Toolbox, and how he said one of his girlfriends had “Roast Beef P*ssy”. After long debate, the Circle named Richard “French Drip”. …Congratulations French Drip!
AHNS received a Friend-of-Whitey Tshirt, after going out an buying more can beer when the keg ran out
The ON ON ON was at the Shiloh Club on Studewood…. Nice place except for the damn cigarette smoke. AHNS was in a good mood, buying anyone who rubbed his head a beer. We tried unsuccessfully to get a song circle going…. Where’s Keezer the Sleezer when you need him. The ON ON ON got pretty rowdy. One un-named Harriette had a line of guys on their knees waiting for a Titty Shake. That was followed by a Conga Line through the bar with EZ Fag, SOS, Crack of Dawn, Donut Holer, Bare Ass Burn, Mighty Mouse, and Burning Rubber.
The ON ON ON ON consisted of about 10 of us going to La Jaliscience (aka Jolly Science), where we had just what everyone needed and another margarita!
For such a rotten day, the hares did a good job. Since it was close in many people still came out. The run was short and the party long! In this author’s opinion, we need runs like this (in-town street runs) just like we need Shiggy runs, way out runs, and pub crawl runs. Diversity! …is good!
Good Luck All Head No Shaft! We’ll miss you!