More information, a schedule, rego forms and a Paypal link can all be found here.

Not everything is there and not every link works, but most of them are up at http://h4.org/archive/.

This covers 2006-1994 or so. I am still trying to get the archives between 2006 and when I took over in May 2008. For now, you can access some of the archives for those in-between years at the links below:

http://h4.org/archive/2006_Runs/
http://h4.org/archive/2007_Runs/
http://h4.org/archive/2008_Runs/

The link to the archives in the sidebar on the home page will be updated soon.

Happy Valentine’s Day. You can thank me later.

Hashing for a cause… the hares planned this much controversial Red Dress run as the official H4 weekly run on a Saturday in order to keep our calendars free for Valentine’s Day!  How thoughtful!  They also added an optional donation to the Americal Heart Association so our guys could have a “valid” excuse for wearing red dresses through the busy streets of the Heights on a sunny Saturday afternoon.  Whatever blows your skirts up…

The hares and hounds met at the Big Lots on Shepherd and 11th, where the strip center patrons had a field day with our crowd.  Dick the Boy Wonder, aka the school girl, was kind enough to bring extras for those who were without.

Twenty-two virgins attended, and what better event to introduce people to the hash than the famous red dress run?! 

The hares were off with a 10 minute start.  EZ did chalk talk, and finally, the pack was off to find the hares. 

The trail wound through the beautiful Heights neighborhood, with a beer check at an abandoned bank parking lot.  We made our way down a main drag full of shoppers and diners, most entertained by our attire.

The end was under an overpass in a warehouse parking lot with plenty of privacy.  Kegs of Abita Amber and Natural Light welcomed us after a warmer than usual run, along with delicious homemade delicacies prepared by the hares. 

As the sun set, our sweat turned to chills, so we bundled up for a fabulous circle, tag teamed by Mama’s Boy and McPisser.  This included not only asking the new boots their names and who made them cum, but also asking their favorite sexual position.  The “Eiffel Tower” was a crowd favorite, that came with a full demonstration by volunteers, but the virgin admitted to me that he’d never actually done it, but so wanted to. 

Beat My Meat called Just Fran into the circle to suggest a possible naming.  Her shocking reaction, being that she’s been hashing for five f*cking minutes, was “I don’t even know who the f*ck he is!”  Really?  At the Haiti Relief Hash, she got her panties in a wad about Snatcha giving RA, EZ to Please, the mini megaphone at Hans Bier Haus when the neighboring highrise was in a lawsuit with the bar for disturbing the peace.  She snatched the megaphone from Snatcha, so… “Scissor Me, Xerxes” was the suggested name (a South Park reference).  This didn’t stick, as apparently no one has seen that South Park Episode.  Other names were suggested, but finally, she went down as Just Fran, and she rose as “Tits & Asics”, or T&A. 

Horsefli Driveby learned what a cowgirl position was, although it looked like he already knew, showing his Brass Monkey after partiers by the shadow of the night light last weekend. Dirty sinner!

Twinkle Toes got a down down for Raider, the only boy dog, peeing on my hash bag.  My li’l weenie dog had already marked it with his little weenie pee, but Raider emptied his big bladder all over it. 

A new boot revealed to someone that she had a fresh wax job.  This led to many possible namings, but since she referred to her hoo-ha as her “wonderful”, the crowd loved “Some kind of Wonderful” as a possible name.  Since she was a virgin, we decided to table it for later.  Hope that one sticks! 

The final accusation was for all of the hashers with implants to come into the circle and have their significant others disarm the possible bombs that reportedly Al-Qaida has been using as weapons of mass destruction.  We were all clear, and our men were by our sides to take one for the team.

The on-on-on was at the always fun The Usual Neighborhood Pub on T.C. Jester, which had a great turnout.  We raised almost $500 for charity!  Great job, hares!

Their small stage was the setting for some delicious dance moves by hashers!  The music improved when the DJ arrived, took over our stage, and made us dance on the lower deck. 

We all bid farewell to Two Holes and Glad He Ate Her, who will be leaving on their 10 month journey!  Yous guys are some of the best people that we know, and we will all miss you!  But we are glad that your travels will lead you right back here… to Houston!!!  Home!  Love you guys!

More beer was consumed, and more dances were danced, more boobs were felt, and more panties were seen… then we took it to El Rey’s… where the fluorescent lighting showed us what middle aged folks look like after a hard night of partying.  Ugh!  Ate some greasy Mexican food and took it to the house.

on-on to the Pisces Hash hared by Puke!

Love, your matchmaking scribe,
Really? F*ck!!

To support all your crossdressing needs!

This Saturday the Houston Hash House Harriers present the wicked re-animation of our annual RED DRESS RUN! Cum wear your sexiest red dress and show off some leg!

• Live Hares!
• Abita beer! WHO DAT?
• Piss beer for Colt’s fans!
• Foodstuffs including Ass Swipe’s illustrious Indian food!
• Men in skirts!
• Tits out for the boys!
• $5 for entry but bring extra hash cash to donate to the American Heart Association.
  (H4 is not just wankers! We’re wankers with heart!)

Meet at 3:00 pm at 919 Shepherd Houston, TX 77008 in the Big Lots/Kroger parking. Hares off @ 3:30 pm sharp. Be prepared to show your manhood through the ultra trendy, super busy Heights neighborhood!

On-on to this EPIC DAY! We promise a fun day for all!

- Ass Wipe, Easy to Please, Platterpuss, and Smelly Trench

Pooper Bowl before

Pooper Bowl after

Who will be next in the Pooperbowl lineage?

Nervous that the cold weather and water crossing would keep people at home by their fireplaces, 8″ Crack sent multiple enticing emails luring hashers outdoors with homemade chili and veggie soup and a keg o Blue Moon… with orange slices.  How could we resist her annual birthday celebration?

The hounds met in the grocery store parking lot by Church’s Chicken on Sheldon Road.  The hares kept assuring us that there would be sun, but the skies were so cloudy.  Luckily, the sun popped out right before chalk talk, and the layers of clothing peeled off.  We were ready to rumble!

Under the freeway, and almost immediately into the shiggy.  The ground wasn’t too saturated, at first.  We crossed a few small water crossings with a leap, but there was still the promise of a wader.  I was hoping it would be towards the end, but that was not the case.  Less than halfway through the run, we waded through “fuzzy thermometer” high (B*tt Pirate) hella cold water.  Could still feel our feet. Good sign.

We came across some crazy woman wearing pink Mickey Mouse ears with BB embroidered on the back, hanging out with a cooler of beer.  Brady’s B*tch!  Quite refreshing, although it produced 2 miles worth of ladylike belches.

The second half of the run was a bit soggier.  We trudged in and out of the marshy areas with ankle deep or deeper mucky water.  On-on to the dry street where we passed presumeably a dead dog stuffed in a black garbage bag on the side of the road.  I smelled it first, then looked back to see a tan tail sticking out, then dry heaved for a quarter of a mile. 

Around the corner and down a long straightaway by the railroad tracks, and we see the on-in.  Pick up our bags and walk down a paved road in the brush, and behold!  A fabulously acoustic concrete bunker.  Many of us took shelter to change into warm and dry clothes.  Others enjoyed displaying their chanting skills.

Will He Peter brought his propane heater, and Pee Wee supplied the lovely firepit, where our resident pyro’s played until the fire was roaring and warm.  They were competing for who could provide the perfect kindling, eyes twinkling the entire time.

Delicious chili, veggie soup, tamales, the usual hash snacks, and Blue Moon were served.  Nothing like home cookin’ and a roaring fire to warm us on the inside and out. 

The beer was good… so good, I can’t remember any of the super lame accusations. .. except that Just Nate was finally named.  B*tt Pirate called him out for always finding balls on trail.  The options were discussed amongst the circle, and he went down as Just nate, and he rose as “Ball Tender”.  Congrats, Nate, eeerrrr… Ball Tender.  Perfect naming!

The on-on-on was not far from the start at Ray’s Ice House.  They had a modest selection of beers, but a roomy, warm facility, a kickin’ juke box, pool tables, and a fire hydrant in the men’s room urinal trough.  NARC picked up some Church’s chicken, so we snacked some more.  Thanks, NARC!

The fun continued until late, and most folks were gone by the time we stumbled to the car.  BM2 lost the rock/paper/scissors bout, so he was designated driver.  Yes!

Thanks, 8″ and Pull the Plug for a great trail, on-in and on-on-on!

On-on to the Brass Monkey Hash events at the end of the week and Pooperbowl Sunday!

oo, xx, oo, X, o, XX, x,
[Hug hug, kiss kiss, hug hug, big kiss, little hug, kiss kiss, little kiss] (care of Nacho Libre)
Really? F*@k!

A couple of photos from the Cock & Balls Unplugged hash. See more photos here.

pack at 1st water crossing