MOre of Grind’s pictures are here.

The 99th monthly run of Galveston H3. Start at 4 pm (4:45 pm) on Sat 7/25/2009 on west Galveston Isle at Buccaneer Lane (12-mile road) (actually a long couple of blocks away at end of Mutiny Lane near Pocket Park 3. Here is Hooter’s trace of the trail of 3.8 miles (you can see at mile marker 1 the 3/4 mile nature trail no one ran).

Highlights: On Stewart Road the 1936 marker for Lafitte’s Grove & the Battle of Three Trees in 1821 between Freebooter Jean Lafitte and the Karanakawa Indians. Who won? (See links below.) Trees are still there shaped by the prevailing winds from seaward. A segment of about 3/4 mile of nature trail which Hounds short cut. Lone Pint Belgian Ale & Keystone Light at end of trail. Beached Laser sailboat at center of the circle for balancing acts. Circle led by Pimp Doggie Dog and passed on to Vanilla Starfish.

Hounds Ass Wipe, Anal 101 & wife & 2 kids, PP & Saltwater Taffy & kid Holden, Santa Claus, Grind Slut, Gaslight, Parson’s Nose, new boot www.CleanHarbors.com Zanahoria (sp?), Vanilla Starfish, Ass Grabber, Steps In Shit, Easy Rider & kid Adam, Pimp Doggie Dog, Cums Anyway, McPisser, F**k Me Running, Hooter Bill

— Hooter Bill

Correction from Asswipe: A few “nobody’s” actually ran true trail along the nature preserve – Ass Swipe, Saltwater Taffy, Out of Tuna, and Steps in Shit. Those who didn’t run it missed a very fine portion of trail; those who did were the last to the beer check.

In Hooter’s absence, here’s an attempt at hash trash for Goldilock’s rogue Galveston hash:

About a dozen hashers showed up to celebrate Goldilock’s pending departure for the Bahamas Islands. The hounds were Pearl Necklace, Ass Grabber, Vanilla Starfish, Pleather Balls, Santa Claus, Beat My Meat, Really?, F*ck, Dick the Boy Wonder, Just Emily, Pull the Plug, and Platterpuss. Since this was a live hare run, Goldilocks got a 10 minute head start. As soon as the hounds left the parking lot the trail headed into the shiggy along one of the tributaries of Clear Lake. The pack stuck together as we plowed through briars and tall saltgrass in the sweltering heat. We dodged hurricane Ike debris and barbed wire fences before coming to a watercrossing through the most awful smelling mud that I have ever encountered. We sank knee deep into the mud and crotch deep into the black water. As we emerged, one by one, the pack began to spreadout a little bit.

The first two miles were pretty much all shiggy. As FRBs Vanilla Starfish and Platterpuss exited the shiggy and entered a residential street, they caught the hare. So they waited for a few minutes while the rest of the pack caught up with them. Once we were all back together, we stayed pretty bunched up for the rest of the trail. Especially since the checks were harder because the hare didn’t want to be caught again.

Things went smoothly until we neared the Kemah Boardwalk area where our hare erred good judgment and laid the trail through back yard of some unappreciative home owners. As the hounds came through, we were stopped by the Kemah police and warned not to trespass again and to stay off the roads. So we tried to stay on sidewalks until the hare erred good judgment again and laid trail through and around a very crowded boardwalk. The trail led us through the fountain area where a live “Rock the Dock” concert was in progress.

As we exited the Boardwalk and headed toward the marina, we were stopped again by the cops and this time they were REALLY unhappy. They explained to us that it was really stupid to be running through a crowd and throwing down flour, in this day and time. The hounds explained that we were only following trail. The Kemah police officer said that he didn’t care who did it and that we couldn’t leave until it was cleaned up. Goldilocks eventually emerged and admitted that he was the culprit, and he was ordered to clean the boardwalk of all of he flour. So with a broom and bucket of water in hand, he proceeded to clean up the trail, while the hares continued to the end aboard the boat “Iron Maiden” which was moored in the marina.

After Goldilocks finished his clean-up duties, the circle commenced aboard the Iron Maiden. Dick the Boy Wonder and Goldilocks took turns as RA. The accusations were plentiful as we enjoyed the boat and the pleasant surroundings. Several attempts were made to name Just Emily. Chum Bucket and Chum Bait were among the names suggested before the group finally settled on “Thar She Blows”. So she went down as Emily, and came up as “Thar She Blows”.

After the circle ended, stories were told, lies were explained, the perfect breast size was discussed, and suggestions for the upcoming 100th Galveston H3 run were thrown out. Thanks to Goldilocks for the shitty trail and great adventure. Life is good.

On-on
Pull the Plug

Here’s Hooter’s trace of the Galveston H3 trail of about 4 miles laid by the Hare, Nice Jugs, celebrating his birthday. Start was on northeast corner of I-45 (Gulf Fwy) at Hwy 518 in League City.

If you zoom in, you can see where the trail ended for our circle in the park just before the 4.0 mile mark. After the circle in the park (cans of Coors & Lone Star), we walked through a gap in the fence and along the street (past the 4.0 mile mark) to the pool and keg of Shiner and mini-keg of blonde Lone Pint (getting Hooter’s endorsement) and BBQ of pulled pork at Nice Jugs’ home on Civil Drive.

A good adult swim for the 20 or so hashing, supplemented by various lady Louisianans including Nice Jugs’ wife. Hooter departed about 10:30 pm, when Dick The Boy Wonder was tuning up his guitar.

About 20 appeared for this 98th monthly run of Gal H3: Gaslyte, Grindslut, Ass Grabber, Ass Wipe, Pimp Doggie Dog, Santa Claus, Cant Touch This, Little Boy Blew, Plether Balls, Pearl Necklace & hubby Tim & brother Trevor, & Papa Pint, Vanilla Starfish, 8″ Crack, Dick The Boy Wonder, Heartache, Womb Service, Hooter Bill, and the Hare Nice Jugs (and Horsefli Drivebi and girlfriend paying respects at the start on their way back from a morning of extreme water sports in Galveston).

Hooter’s account

Start was at Brookwood School, about 5 miles east of I-10 along Clear Lake City Blvd, where it turns right and becomes Middlebrook Drive. What a great hash! A spring shower*. A rushing stream. Green new woods. A pack of three, Little Boy Blue and Heartache and Hooter Bill.

By the magic of cell phones the pack after the run found the hares Pearl Necklace and Pleather Balls with auto-stranded hasher Vanilla Starfish at Slurpy’s (Trevor) and Incest Is Best’s garage (Lone Pint Brewery) for an on on that went on on on. Many stories were told, reputations ruined.

Here is map Hooter traced for the trail, some of it based on hearsay, while Hooter was fighting lions.

* The Houston Chronicle said that it rained 6 inches yesterday afternoon in the Clear Lake area. Cars stranded everywhere, but the PT Cruiser got through.

Heartache’s account

The Hash will go on, rain, hail or shine!

I arrived at the school at 3:40 p.m., having crawled down I-45 through the crowds of stalled vehicles. And saw a few cars in the parking lot. But no gathering of hashers. I parked beside Hooter Bill’s Cruiser, but did not notice anyone inside, as the windows were fogged up…

Crap, I thought, the pack is off without me. And no hares in sight! So I jumped out of my vehicle, into cool water up to my ankles. And ran over to a fella in the entrance to the school, asking “are you a runner?” Yes, he said, but not today! I am here to pick up my son…..

So I turned around and set out across the parking lot. I passed my vehicle and then, as I passed the truck in front, noticed Little Boy Blew inside. What’s up, I asked? He was trying to contact the hares on his cell phone, explaining to me that he was the only one there.

What about Hooter Bill, I asked. At which point we both noticed Hooter sitting in his Cruiser. Great, we have a pack! Lets run! After numerous attempts. Pearl Necklace was contacted and gave us directions to the first mark, luckily in Green tape. Hooter Bill was loath to leave the confines of his Cruiser, knowing he would get his feet wet, but was persuaded to join us. A stirrup cup of fine 10-yr old Bushmills was used to encourage one and all.

And it was good! We stumbled off into the gathering gloom, finding occasional bits of plastic flagging, fought our way through raging torrents, impenetrable briars and toe-sucking mud. We fought off packs of wild dogs and feral pigs defending their young. Hooter Bill faced down a mountain lion by stating “I am a Lawyer!”.

And after some hours of struggle, made it to the end of the trail. Where there were dancing nymphs and a choir of angels to greet us. But no hares and no beer! So we returned to our chariots and decided to invade the Lone Pint Brewery, which we did, to find the hares, along with Vanilla Starfish, who had succumbed to the high water and been rescued by PleatherBalls.

And we drank through the night, consumed much Pizza. And all was right in the hashing world!

So it was a BEAUTIFUL day for hashing! Due to it being spring break and the same day as the memorial service for a fallen hasher, attendance wasn’t what is usually is. But that did not stop us from having optimal fun! Those in attendance were Brady’s Bitch, 8″ Crack, Can’t Touch This (only till after the first beer check), Steps in Shit, Hooter Bill, Juices Flowing, Roll Model, Pound Puppy, Pearl Necklace, and Pleather Balls. We also had 2 Visitors from Baton Rouge…..I hope I get his name right….Holy Hoover and his wife ThumpHer.

Our hares took off on a live (mostly they said) hared trail with the rest of the pack waiting anxiously on Hooter to hurry up and arrive. Finally, he got there, we explained the markings, and off the 6 of us that were running true trail went. Okay, so for those of you who were at Ass Grabber and Just Emily’s run, it was like we started running the course backwards. Starting off at Boondoggles, we went behind it and into the neigborhoods for a little more than 2 miles before hitting our first beer check. Skipping the Beer and preferring water, I drank till I was happy. Grabbing another bottle of water, off we went back to the streets. We finally come into an area of shiggy with a serious amount of cluster F*ck checks! At one point, Pleather and Pearl were seen on the ground laughing so hard because there were 2 checks within 5 feet of themselves. And then 10 feet from those were another….and another….and another! One couldn’t claim there weren’t enough checks on trail!

Finally we find ourselves out of the shiggy and on the grass running along the railroad tracks headed south on 146. We soon arrive at Hooter’s for a Bar Check. After chugging 2 pints of piss beer…I was happy! And Hooter Bill was even more happy when all the “Hooter” gals came to take a picture with him!! Anyway…we all knew what was coming up after we left Hooter’s. The Kemah Bridge! So we got our whits about us and took off. Hooter and Pound Puppy walking, the rest of us cantering along. Pleather and Pearl shot off up and over the bridge in great time!! Steps in Shit and I were slightly behind. SIS much closer to them than me!! We were told where the end was going to be due to heavy traffic and the insane number of people headed to Kemah. As I arrive a few minutes behind FRB’s Pleather, Pearl, and SIS, I hear them laughing while they explain how they caught the hare. Booboo was carying what was left of the flour in a bag. The FRB’s just yelled out to Booboo asking if they were in the correct place….then Booboo dumps the remaining flour like it was cocaine and takes off running for fear of being caught!! Pearl said they were running around yelling “catch him” like he was a thief of something. People enjoying the boardwalk, I think, were about to call the cops for fear of something being really wrong!

Anyway, because of the heavy traffic, our beer was not there yet. Luckily I had some money in my bra and Booboo had some too. Us four runners went into T-Bone Tom’s and had a pitcher of St. A’s Spring Bock and sat there till Brady’s Bitch had arrived with the piss beer. Finally, Goldiloxxx arrives with the Lone Pint.

Circle finally started….your typical accusations…nothing special other than we were being watched by several people who were walking by us in Kemah.

We finished the circle, but still had plenty of Lone Pint left. We couldn’t have any of that leftover, so Steps in Shit volunteered his newly remodled house for us to hang in (and to show off to us before the furniture was moved in) and drink the beer that was left!! We sat around chatting and admiring the changes SIS had made to his home. His wife arrived and we praised her for her choices (she’s an Interior Designer) of everything that she had done to the house! After ordering Pizza, we inhaled it, finished off the beer, then headed to Boondoggles to drink some more!

Thanks to the hares for a great day of fun!!!

About 16* including the hares gathered under the bridge at Kemah for the start of Galveston H3 on Sat Dec 27. The hares Starfish and Pearl were wearing jungle slippers. Trail led through streets with canals and boats. Then it crossed a busy road and led through a trailer park to a lake. At this point Hooter Bill elected to go around by a side road and bridge, to avoid crossing the water.

Finding a check and trail along FM 518 Hooter followed trail to the check at the long straight ditch that took Hooter back to the lake. Then no more trail. So Hooter ran back to the start, and found out he was running it backwards.

True trail had gone the other way on FM 518, criss-crossing, and then into the finish at Pleather Balls’ new swankienda. Hot dogs and multi beers. Momma’s Boy led the circle, giving us a graphic description of a Roman Warrior’s Helmut. Emily made Rachel and Sarah come, and just about everyone else. So, after awarding Gal H3 Golden Trail of the Year to themselves, the hares awarded the Golden Ho of the Year to Emily. Real gold trophies. Emily and Ass Grabber volunteered to be hares for the January run, tentatively set for Sat Jan 31.

*The 16 included hare Pearl Necklace, hare Vanilla Starfish, Pull the Plug, Little Boy Blew, Momma’s Boy, Ass Grabber, Emily, Rachel, Sarah, Pleather Balls, Santa Claus, Heartache, Cums Anyway, McPisser, Hooter Bill. This was the 92nd monthly run of Gal H3, since Run 1 in May 2001 hared by founder Sleds & Turds.

— Hooter Bill

Here is a blast from the past! Rubbin’ recently emailed the GH3′s Yahoo group a Hash Trash (in the form of Powerpoint) from the 17th running of the Galveston Hash, September 2002.