Hare: Menage Myself
With no one signed up to hare H4 Run #1574, viagra 40mg hash martyr and Joint Master Menage Myself (whom I always want to refer to as “Menage Thyself”) stepped up to plate to bring us Beaver in the Burbs III: Son of the Beaver.
Trail began just north of the Intersection of FM 1960 and Kuykendahl Rd near Cypress Creek. Could this be an incognito running of the elusive 1960 Hash? Were we duped? A few runners were duped at the start when they asked the hare of there was poison ivy on trail. Hare responded with “Not that I saw.” It was determined the hare is legally blind.
Daily summer thunderstorms had left much of Houston spongy and sticky, bronchi and within the first several minutes of the run almost everyone was covered in mud. Trail started off east from the start, under Kuykendahl and into the woods where a soft sandy shelf was all that kept hashers from falling into the creek. Trip-wire vines and low-hanging branches prevented almost everyone from running, and as a result the pack stayed together for almost all of the run.
The hare promised plenty of water on trail, but twice members of the pack expressed dissent with regards to getting wet. The first occurred early in trail, when from the bank above several runners saw a snake swimming in the creek below. Hash Boy Scout Grind Slut dove right into the water, ignoring the path of flour, to chase the serpent, but was outwitted.
The second occurred further south into the woods when it became abundantly clear there was no way around the solid-green sludge-covered pond. Either you go through it, or you turn around and go back to the start.
A little further north and east of the sludge pond trail emerged onto a paved road, and then a grassy easement before ducking back into the woods again. Looping back towards Kuykendahl, and coming within a few blocks of the bridge we ran under at the start, trail ended in a deserted cul de sac just around the corner from the office complex start.
Circle commenced quickly and transfer Strap On Malibu Ken Doll from Guantanamo Bay, Cuba (we seem to be welcoming lots of military reboots lately!) was introduced, along with the handful of young male virgins he brought along.
One virgin was wearing head-to-toe Under Armor and suffered the wrath of the circle who felt him label whore-ness was a little excessive. Grind Slut came in DFL with a guilty looking Hooter Bill. “Chasing snakes” indeed.
On a side note — four or five new virgins at a run is amazing if they all decide to come back. If you see a virgin at run, introduce yourself! Remember, the hash should be as fun for confused new boots as it is for all us regulars.
And a big thanks goes out to Menage Thyself, who managed to lay a truly wonderful shiggy-licious trail at the last minute with only minimal scouting the Friday before. If you think it takes a lot of time and planning to be a hare you should talk to him, or any of the other regular hares for assistance in laying your own trail.
— On on, Snatcha, your humble scribe and secretary