Hares: Steps in Shit and 8″ Crack

It’s weird, cause we had this run down in the books for months! We were going to do so much scouting and make this a great trail! Then the Bastard Ike arrived and changed all our plans! So after talking to Steps in Shit, we both took on the challenge of scouting a trail online. Yes I know…WTF?!!

The day finally arrived and we met at Frankie Carter Randolph Park in Friendswood on the southeast side of town and took off to lay trail. The challenge was the damn police! (No offense NARC) Only certain areas of the park were actually off limits to people, but as we learned a few days earlier, the entire trail system was off limits. So we took off with our bags of flour and very innocently ducked into the woods to lay our renegade trail away from the prying eyes of the police!

We went as deep as we could going east in the woods going over downed trees and trying to avoid Poison Ivy (and yes there was PI on the trail…I still have marks 2 weeks later!). We came upon the fence where we realized we needed to start heading north. More shiggy to hopefully make the pack happy! We eventually came out to the Pipe Easement next to the Golf Course. Trail went west towards the Bayou where we planned on making the pack cross the water. We looked for at least 30 minutes for a section to cross that didn’t look too deep. And yes, as most of you know…..we bad, bad hares actually didn’t do the water crossing! More on that later!

So across the bayou the pack was to go (which I heard even the tallest person in the pack could not touch bottom) and up the hill they went! They took off north again into the neighborhood where the nice hares left them REALLY cold water! Did it ever un-freeze enough to drink?? Anyway, around the neighborhood they went and back into some tall grass. Then back down by the bayou where we fully intended on having them cross again, but all we could find was private property to come up out of the water into…and we all know where that would have led!

They then headed across FM whatever the road is, and into another neighborhood that took them into the trails of Memorial Park (Friendswood version of Memorial that is) and on to the BN mark at a very pleasant ending! From what Pussy Checker told me, trail was right around 3 miles…which is what we had hoped for at the least!
As Mama’s Boy missed the run today, McPisser stepped in as the RA for the day. The evil hares were called into the circle and made to drink for our wonderful easy trail! Steps in Shit was then called into the circle along with Black Bush for October birthdays.

McP called for accusations and I swear I just about crapped my pants. There were none! Finally someone made something up and the circle finally lit up with tons of funny accusations. Shockingly, there was only one complaint about the trail, that coming from Grind Slut. Something about missing a great section of shiggy (I was getting drunk by then thanks to all the stupid accusations for the hares, so my memory is lacking right now!). I know he was right; we did miss a wonderful section! Shame on us shitty hares!

Anyway, back to the water crossing. So SIS and I walked around for a long time debating whether we really felt like actually doing the crossing ourselves. After finding a good spot for the pack to cross, we then headed back to our cars and drove to the other side of the bayou to lay the last half of the trail. Okay, so SIS, after NUMEROUS beers, actually admitted this to one of the members of the pack. So we got called into the circle. I can actually remember taking my visor off and beating the living shit out of Steps in Shit for telling our secret! Do you have bruises SIS??

After me begging everyone to continue with stupid accusations because we still had a good bit of beer left in the keg, the announcement was made that the ON ON ON was going to be at the Time Out Sports Bar #2 on El Dorodo. So several hashers were kind enough to stick around and try to finish the keg, but the bugs started biting and we all took off for the bar.

Several hashers actually showed up at the ON ON ON where they had the chance to play some pool. Vanilla Starfish, Pearl Necklace, and Pleather Balls could all be found at the pool table!

All in all, considering we weren’t able to scout trail like we had hoped due to Ike destroying SIS’s house, I think the day went fairly well! It was no trail of the year, but it was a good easy, shiggy run with very little concrete!! Which was our goal!

By the way, the run started at 4 p.m. and we had roughly 40 hounds in the pack!