“Memorial Day Observed Hash“ Run # 1011        May 25, 1998 Hares: Hooter/Drummer Bill, Steaming Bush    
Hooter Bill  is changing his habits.  He used to spend his mornings kicking back at a corner table in the Memorial Drive, “One’s-A-Meal”, reading the Wall Street Journal,  chewing on a muffin and sipping coffee.  Now Hooter  spends his mornings kicking back at a corner table in the Kirby Drive, “Stone Mill” bakery, reading the Wall Street Journal,  chewing on a muffin and sipping coffee.
 
Hooter  is credited for some notably bad trails over the years.  Could that be changing too?  And how could that happen?

Hounds:  The pack converges just south of Beltway 8 near Bush Airport on Aldine-Westfield Road.  Steaming Bush , Ass Grabber, F2 , C.R.A.F.T. , and Rootless  are straight in from Dallas/Ft.Worth Halfway to Hell Hash,  Vicar Licker  from Galveston and Boy George  from Garner State Park.  The Reverend, Ice Chest (with two “New-boots”), Sweet Meat, Bush Snapper, Twirlyman, Kenton, Seman  and Keezer the Sleezer  have re-booted for the Hash today.  Air is 90_, dry and the Mexican smoke is moderate to light.  Everyone seems pleasantly relaxed, either rested or exhausted from the long weekend.  

Scenery and landscape:  We have Greens Bayou and its tributaries (aka ditches).  We have shady woods with palmetto groves. We have mountains (of dirt). One is a twenty foot razorback ridge of large fresh dirt clods that make a challenging technical ascent.  Another is a weathered hill that overlooks a woods that echoes with the gun pops from band of paint ball assassins.  We have concrete foundation slabs near the woods that are the size of runways.  We have Ice Chest  and her “New-boots”.

Checks:  The checks work.   Geek  actually leads the pack and finds some of the trail, but still manages to shortcut his way to near DFL status.

Drama: Roller Balls  and Smelly Trench  say they were hit by paint balls, but I have my doubts.  Roller Balls  claims the paint washed away with sweat.  And the red liquid on Smelly Trench’s  arm just looks like plain old blood.   We stampede some grazing cattle.  Bandits steal the water  from the water check; we survive the one hour trial without it.

Delegation of Responsibility:  Steaming Bush  has it covered.  She picks up and delivers cold beer, and keeps Hooter’s  car key from becoming lost.

On Home & On-on-on:  Good locations.  Fine “Circle”. Only one police cruiser shows up. He is too late and only wants a quiet place to nap. Rootless gets his On-the-road Hash name verified.
“Bobby’s On The Bayou” has chairs on the porch, music on the jukebox and good cold beers.  More drama. Hooter orders pizza for everyone.  By ten o’clock no pizza has arrived.  Hashers are leaving.  Sticky Lips and I salivate as we count down the number of Hashers that are leaving and count up the potential number of pizza slices per capita.  But Pipes,  unknowingly, canceled the order an hour ago.  ¡Qué lástima!  On-on-on-on to “Jaliscience”.

How did Hooter Bill do it?  Not even a Hash icon like Hooter  can absolutely guarantee a good Hash Run, but time, attention to detail, sweat and blood go a long way.  That’s how he did it.  Good run, Hotter Bill. Scribe: Dumpster Digger 

On Up!