It was a glorious Houston afternoon (weather similar to a hasher's armpit). Thunder threatened, but we were not granted rain - despite all of "Rain Bitch's" promises. Hashers gathered at the infamous Full Moon Parking Lot for a hash that likely won't be forgotten (especially by hounds running it for the third time). The occasion: "Hooter Bill" and "Reverend Bob's" 20th anniversary hash. Wow, twenty years - what a waste.

From the Full Moon parking lot, the pack headed south, paralleling the railroad tracks. The start of the hash was cleverly timed to coincide with a train mooning opportunity. After adjusting running shorts, the hounds continued about 1/4 mile down a false trail. Upon realizing it was a falsie, we dashed back to the start and the first check, greeted by smirking hares and walkers. True trail headed north to another very well planned train encounter (this time on a trestle). Hashers without life preservation instincts crossed Memorial via trestle, while the wankers turned back and took the only slightly less suicidal route - crossing Memorial at street level. We followed flour to a vaguely familiar horse path through the woods. At the next check, many hashers reported feelings of déjà vu. Trying to ignore it, we headed on-on to the polo field. Not able to shake that feeling that we had all been here before, we rambled through the brambles and around to the Memorial Park jogging track. Hmmm - how could it be that this trail, laid by such experienced hares, was so similar not only to the previous Thursday's Full Moon Run, but also to "Womb Service's" post-Erections rogue hash. Is this the kind of senility we can hope to expect after 20 years of hashing? The trail crossed Memorial again and entered the Ho Chi Minh bike paths. Up and down, in and out we went. By then it was beyond hot, and I was on autopilot, thinking only of the delicious taste of glorious beer.

We were greeted at the end by a keg of piss beer, an army of bananas, and various salted items. The on-on marked the inauguration of "Dick the Boy Wonder" as Religious Advisor. "Grind Slut" transferred R.A. duties through a special blessing ceremony, complete with a baptism. "Dick the Boy Wonder" was robed in his royal apparel and coated head to crotch with warm, sticky prune juice. The odor was breathtaking. We all hoped that this would make "Dick the Boy Wonder" a little more regular (after all, he did miss his inaugural hash).

"Bald Eagle", running his last official Sunday hash captured the moment by being DFL. All that self-amusement since "Lazy Worm's" departure must really be wearing him down. The circle also marked the christening of new hasher Head Sucker.

The beer ended, as did the circle. Lots of grumbling about the beer supply was heard, but hey, after all the time the hares spent scouting trail - we can't complain. And, anyway, Hooter managed to keep his shorts up the entire circle.

The on-on-on was at The Lion's Den (a farewell tribute to "Bald Eagle"?). Apparently (I wasn't there), Maria (said with a heavy Mexican accent) was quite a hit, and "Just Jim" informs us that her tacos are delicious.

All in all, a lovely hash. Thanks, hares, for 20 years of service and hopefully many more years of amusement.

-Bidet Bitch