Last time

The last Cock and Balls Hash ended with an audible crack as Tuna Helper's clavicle shattered into at least two pieces. Could the hares out do themselves? Read on.

Somewhere in suburbia

The Cock and Balls III started at the intersection of Jones and Grant roads in far northwest Houston. There was some kind of connection with Uncle Remus and shiggy? The hash began with a controversy as the hares were accosted by a Randall's assistant manager and his bag boy sidekick. Someone pointed out that Go Texan day was two weeks ago and they left. There were a lot of dogs at this hash. The hares handed out gummy worms for each hasher to carry during the run. A special prize was promised for those with the will and determination to carry the thing for the whole trail. Drummer Bill was seen distributing pornography to some local elementary school kids. On On.

The trail headed west from the start and followed a drainage ditch. Repelled by the sight of concrete, we crossed the ditch and headed into the woods. We eventually made it back to the ditch where it connected with Cypress Creek and ran into the SCB's that had just followed the ditch the whole way. We ran through some great terrain with lots of hills and trees and came out near Compaq. After several more creek crossings we came to a YMCA complex and got totally screwed up for about ten minutes, but eventually found trail. We paralleled a small canal and eventually came across a very phallic arrow labeled with a large ON ON directing us towards the requisite sewage treatment plant and the On Home. We found Rollerballs at the end but alas, no beer.

ooh, what stinks?

While we were waiting for the beer to show up, Goes Both Way's new boot showed up with two large dogs. Moments later a cry went out as the odor hit the fringe of the forming group. One of the dogs had found a dead animal and was writhing in the rotten remains. The hash moved about 100 yards up the road and eventually the beer arrived. About fifteen minutes after the walkers came in, Dickhead, Catamite et al came running in. It seems that Rollerballs had hidden and waited for the FRB's to come by before laying the On Home arrow. The special prize for lugging the gummy worms ended up being a handful of sandy melted gummy worm.

Down Down's

Rollerballs had gone to look for lost hashers, so Shuttlecock had to do his down down alone. There were about six new boots (minus the one with the stinky dog, who had already gone home). She Muscle Bitch was a visitor from Austin. Comes Daily and Bone Sucker do down downs for flexing and posing. Handi Wipe gets one for putting on makeup when she got in from trail.

The On On On

was at the Crooked Ferret. Notable events: Grind Slut leers at an ex-stripper. A non-scientific poll is taken. Blade Runner locks her arms around the waist of an unsuspecting waitress and almost gets us thrown out. Roller Balls finally shows up.