The Mafia Hash started in an abandoned parking lot at the intersection of South Main and Hillcroft. The same abandoned parking lot where the aggie hash started a few months ago -- a bad omen. It was hot as shit. Late Comer looked particularly comfortable in his polyester pants and pencil mustache. Co-hares Don't Do That and Betty Boob showed off their massive Italian breasts. Late Comer showed off a selection of "dago" records that would be played at the "On-a Home-a" throwing out Bobby Vinton, the one Pollack in the bunch. The hares also announced that one of the highlights of the trail would be a sighting of the Holy Trinity which could be seen through a rusted out hole in the side of an abandoned car. Not since the Jesus and Virgin Mary sighting in Tuna Helper's greenhouse have I been so excited. On-a On-a

The trail went south from the start to a check at a creek bridge. After running through a false on the creek we ran back into true trail which eventually led to the aforementioned divine sighting. Alas, I saw no trinity but did take the opportunity to relieve myself on the shrine. The whole time a small group of us followed the true trail along the creek, we could see the majority of the pack paralleling on the road. More evidence of the race like climate that has consumed the hash as of late. The pack regrouped at a construction sight check. We found trail in a marsh like ditch that ran between two rows of houses. From there, we hit a water check and ran through a neighborhood for a while. The next part of the trail weaved all around a series of sand pits. Wrong Way was the first to dive into the water while everyone watched and wondered what kind of chemical waste was responsible for the vibrant blue color. A check in the woods led us in a circle jerk around a lake. Apparently true trail was back on the road. A few of us ended up off trail on a land bridge that ran between two of the lakes. In the process, Gonad hit a waste high strand of barbed wire at full speed. ouch. We eventually made it into the On Home...from behind.

On-a Home-a

The On Home was at a road construction site next to a horse stable. Bump Slut went to work with a hose offering to shower down any manly man who desired it. One of the horses in the stable was missing an eye, and the empty socket was a source of great discussion. Down Downs came and went quickly as they usually do when food is being served. On the menu: Italian mudfish sandwiches. The kegs floated, and we adjourned to the On On On at Jeannie's Joint. We drank more beer.